July 31, 2011

The Little Changes

This last week was unexpectedly good. An old friend of mine came back into life and I hope to keep them as such for as long as possible. I'm presently back in North Carolina with my family. I'm missing my sister Catherine and Jesse but my understanding is that they're having a lot of fun in Germany.

This afternoon, I enjoyed running around in the warm North Carolinian rain. It was marvelous to do something I haven't done since high school. I didn't take the picture below but I want to use it to help y'all visualize what it looked like when I was outside.


Coming home, I've seen lots of changes in buildings, my house and chapel most notably. I've seen changes in people; kids and teenagers having grown up. Even the familiar environment has grown and changed. As I thought about this, I realized how much I've changed. I haven't been home since December. In that time I've taken seventeen credits, dated two different girls, and been given a new calling. I've learned some of the basics of family history work and many more things on patience and planning. The person I was in December is different from who I am now. I like to think that I'm a more Christlike person then I was.

I've learned that sometimes we have to put aside our deepest desires to do what the Lord wants. It hurts but my personal belief is that when we sacrifice something to the Lord, we always end up by recieving something better in return; the trick is that we usually don't see the better blessing sitting right in front of us. We often only see what we are losing. The Lord knows of your sacrifice and I know that it is not wasted or unseen. I know that when the Lord requires sacrifice He will always bless you. As Elder Holland said "Some blessings come soon, some come late, and some don’t come until heaven; but for those who embrace the gospel of Jesus Christ, they come." I humbly add my testimony to his that they do come. God does ask for a sacrifice without blessing in return. The blessing and its means of coming maybe be unusual but they do happen.

I have learned my short life experience to trust in the Lord. I will be the first to admit that I am far from perfect at this. I will testify that every time, I have trusted in Him everything turns out alright. Things turning our right doesn't mean I don't get hurt or that things magically repair themselves. Usually it means that the Lord supports me and I come out a better and stronger man in the end.

I am home enjoying being my family who I will have for time and all eternity. I hope that each of you can enjoy your family even you are far from them. If you have a hard time, please plead with Heavenly Father to help you to learn to love and appreciate them more. I can promise you that He will open your eyes and help you to see the good in them, no matter how hidden it may seem.

July 24, 2011

A Nugget

First, I'm glad to be alive. I've had a hard week but I've managed to get everything do that I needed to. I was pretty stressed about finals and some other things.

I've been reminded that discouragement is a tool that Satan uses against us. I've felt a little bit of that and other negative emotions. I'm looking forward to seeing my lovely family next week. Well most of them minus two of them but I guess it's okay since my sister, Catherine is going to hatch my future niece or nephew.

I'm grateful that I've been able to feel strongly the Spirit this last week even if I wasn't able to make it to the temple this week. On Saturday, July 16th, I was able to do an ordinance for one my families ancestors. It was neat experience and I love feeling the Spirit of the temple. I felt like it was a tender mercy from the Lord to feel the Spirit in His house and at other times during the week. To me it is a testament of how much the Lord loves and cares for us. I know that He is aware of our situation and that He loves us. He wants things to work out for you, even if that plan is different from how you imagined it. I hope that you continue to learn and grow in your understanding and testimony of His gospel. The Lord has amazing things in store for you. May the Lord bless you to see His hand and how much He loves you is my prayer in the name of our Savior, Jesus Christ amen.

July 17, 2011

Appreciating Your Own Growth

This week started with me stressing out and freaking out about something I will have to learn to live with for a few weeks. It's not a big deal and the Lord made me aware of that. The Lord let me know that there is still much more happiness and joy to come in the future and I know that He speaks the truth. As some of you know my semester here is rounding to the close and so I will have many exams and things to get done. I also have to clean, pack, and change apartments. It will not be easy but it will "faisable" or capable of being done. The good news is that my weekend included going to the temple and doing some work for some of my family and going to the Family History Center on campus. It was very exciting because I managed to find new information and pictures of some of my ancestors. It was beautiful experience because I found a picture of one of my ancestors for whom I did vicarious work on July 16th of last year. (I didn't remember the date, I looked it up in my journal. I think this is an example that the Lord has perfect timing.)

Something that I've been reflecting on this week is being grateful for having time to learn. I know I sometimes that get frustrated in one situation or bored in another. I've recently thought about where I wanted to be this time two years ago and what it'd be like to be where I had intended. I realized how much worse my situation there would be in comparison to where I am now. I remembered how much I have learned having gone through all the experiences that I have had. While not all of them were pleasant, I recognized that the Lord has been teaching me little by little or "line upon line" while also helping me to draw closer to Him and His son. I like who I am now and I love the lessons that I've learned from my experiences. I'm glad that I'm slowly becoming the man that God wants me to be; I believe that he's a lot better man than the person I had envisioned for myself. This week, I finally thanked the Lord for something I thought I'd never thank Him for..... I thanked Him for the time that I've had to be single because of the opportunities that I've had to learn. I know that much of what I've learned, what I'm learning and what I will learn, will help me to one day get married and stay happily married.

So my thought for the week is to stop and ponder over the last few years of your life. Look at what you've learned and how the Lord has helped you grow and become stronger. Then find a time and place to express your gratitude to Heavenly Father for the more beautiful person that you've become.

July 10, 2011

Removing Oneself from the Equation

So this has been a long week on many levels for me. For those of you are unaware, I am again single and yes it was short-lived relationship. But as the French say "C'est la vie."

I have decided to write on a topic that I had thought about posting last week but decided that it might ill suited for that point in time.

Something I have learned on and off my mission is that forgiveness is a key element in the gospel. The forgiving of self and others. Both of these are important to living the gospel. As my teacher Brother Palmer said "There are two things you had better learn to be good at in this life, repenting and forgiving." Sometimes we need to forgive ourselves of these we've done. But more often than not we need to forgive others. This, as many of you know, is not always easy but it is necessary if we are to follow the example of the Savior. Christ taught "For if ye forgive men their trespasses, you heavenly Father will also forgive you: But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses." (Matthew 6:14-15) So as we can see that if we want to stand worthily before "the pleasing bar of Jehovah" then we must forgive others, no matter how much they've wronged us. I believe that I understand why this is necessary.

Last December I saw the movie TRON: Legacy. It is one of favorite movies despite the various flaws that I have found in it. Sam Flynn, the main character from the previous TRON is imprisoned on the fringes of the GRID by a former ally. There he learns to how to "take oneself out of the equation". This phrase at first stuck me as being a hollow ideal meant simply to move the plot along at the ideal time. As the story moves along the audience sees that Sam puts his own value as secondary so that he can better help those for whom he cares. I think that forgiveness requires a bit of the same. We have to learn to "remove [ourselves] from the equation." I mean that we have to let go of the pain and hurt and let it be healed through the Atonement of Christ. Because as we do, we are better able to help and serve those around us. We often end up with more love and compassion for those we love, and we will be better able to serve them. Forgiveness allows us to stop cycles of pain and allows everyone involved to continue their progression.

Christ is obviously our best example of forgiveness. I hope and pray that we can learnt to forgive and "take [ourselves] out of the equation" when necessary.

July 3, 2011

Faith, Agency, and Knowledge

I believe that most of my readers will be already be familiar with the fact that I am now dating a very pretty and active young lady by the name, Kara Wheat; I am very happy about this. I'm happy to have her as a good influence in my life.

I recently finished reading "The Lectures on Faith" written by Joseph Smith and Oliver Cowdery. It's about eighty pages of deep reading. Oftentimes you need to stop and think about what you've just read.

In the lectures, it says that three things are needed for faith to be productive and fruitful. They are 1) a belief that God exists 2) a correct knowledge of His attributes and perfections and 3) a knowledge that one's life is in harmony with the Lord's will. In part of the book it is explained why we need to have an understanding of each attribute and perfection of God and how a lack of even one of them weakens our faith. It reminded me that I need to perfect my own personal testimony of each one. So while I was reading this, I thought about the relationships between faith, agency and knowledge. Last week, I was teaching my family history class and I needed to make fill the rest of the time that my lesson hadn't. So I got a discussion going with my class about this and other things from the lectures on faith. I showed them a simple diagram I came up with to help visualize the relationship.

I should mention that for one of my classes we have to diagram cause and effect for each theory we read so I feel it's getting to me, in a good way.

We discussed the diagram and found that I was missing Incentive. In the end the diagram looked like this.


We found that agency well used increases faith and agency poorly used has the opposite effect. We talked about faith or lack of faith can effect our agency and what we do or don't do. We then talked about how if we have more knowledge of good things then it will increase our faith. The more we develop faith then it will finish by becoming a perfect knowledge. We decided that as our knowledge increases that it then gives us more incentive which in turn increases our agency. It then becomes obvious that we can then use our agency to gain more knowledge. Honestly I think that this fascinating to reflect upon but then again I may just be a gospel nerd.

I hope and pray that we can do a little better at exercising our faith and enlarging our knowledge. I know that as we do so accompanied by humble prayer that the Lord will bless our efforts. I hope that this has helped someone better understand faith and its effects. May the Lord bless your faith is my prayer.